Change can be a scary thought. Fears and doubts can overshadow your self-confidence. Endless scenarios will run through your mind. ‘Ifs and buts’ will start every sentence and will end with a sigh. Your physical, emotional and mental well-being will be out of order too. Everything will become a blur and a journey may seem long and dangerous until you realize that some changes must be made.
I’ve been in my job for over 6 years now. I still love it. I still enjoy the people I work with (well, some of them at least). Recently my boss has become unbearable to work with. I don’t care much of what she says. It’s how she says things that makes me want to leave this job. I keep asking myself, ‘Is she the reason I want to leave? Or am I using her as a scapegoat? I’m still not entirely sure of the answer, but the one thing I am certain is that it’s time for a change. But what that change is I honestly do not know. All I know is that I need one sooner rather than later.
Some changes are good, some are bad. When a change occurs it can turn out well or not so well. It all depends on the timing, planning and most importantly, the person. In this case….Me. I want a change and 2013 is the year for it. I just don’t know how, when or what that is or perhaps a change is not what I really need right now. Perhaps what I really need is to know what I want, then change will perhaps follow. Life can be very complicated at times. We can be unsure of our needs and wants and at the moment I’m on this roller coaster ride hoping that anytime soon I will reach my destination and be at peace at last.
When you feel you need a change it’s important to ask yourself why? I said before that some changes are good and some are bad. Those that turn out bad are sometimes done without any careful consideration. Never do things just to get even with life. Don’t be stupid, quick to judge or jump to conclusions without getting all the facts. Use common sense and put your pride aside. Look at your options and always prepare in case things don’t turn out well. Just because you aren’t prepared it doesn’t mean everything will go wrong. It’s always good to have a back-up plan and there’s nothing wrong preparing for rainy days.
Change will come knocking at your door. You’ll know when it’s calling. Listen. Breathe in, breathe out. Relax. Think it over. Talk it over. Wait. When it comes smiling at you, don’t ignore it. It’s telling you something. When life speaks we must listen. Our journey never ends. We just stop and get comfortable until we feel like walking again. We are never satisfied. We keep wanting for more. We yearn, crave, long and desire for what is out there. We seek. We find, and seek again. A door closes and opens again. Everything changes between one place and another. It may seem repetitive, dull and boring but that’s how it is. The difference is how you feel inside. How you see things. Whatever gives you contentment keep doing that. Find your joy and focus on this. A change is good but it must start with you. It begins once you take the first step. Change can always be pursued but when you see an opportunity grab it before the wind blows it away.
I’m going to make the best of my 2013 but I won’t stop here. It will be a priority from now on. I took many things for granted. Rejected many people, made a big deal about petty things. I postponed and didn’t try hard enough. I caved in to my fears instead of going ahead confidently. I moved backwards instead of moving forward. I dreamed but did not do enough pursuing. I had many losses, and not enough gains. I cried more, instead of laughing more. I beat myself down, instead of picking myself up. I didn’t give myself a chance, and gave no–one else a chance. I was up all night wondering, instead of writing or blogging. I was ashamed of my gifts instead of being proud of them. There was a lot I didn’t do that I wish now I had done. But it’s never ever too late. So, I took a vow of living my life the best way I know how. Take every moment as a gift. Live with the world. Make stories that will put a smile on people faces. Be my own friend when no one is around. This is the change I need and if I find myself sitting at a different desk then it’s a bonus. If I don’t so what something better will come. I will make it count. I will water my own tree, for I am that tree. Weak at first, but grows stronger each passing day. I want to be remembered as someone who won trying and giving all that he can.
What’s change got to do with it?
Everything. We can change. If you want to survive you must change. It’s not easy and can be unbearable from the usual routine. But it’s a step closer to living the life you have imagined. If you’re stuck and unable to move, then relax. Take one step at a time and eventually you’ll find yourself in a open field free to move, with a chance to make that change you have been looking for all your life. It is you who has to make the change. It doesn’t happen by itself and certainly no-one can do it for you. Embrace it. Accept it and be astounded by what it shows you and gives you. Last but not least, a change is a life experience you’ll wish you had done much sooner!
Have you gone through a lot of changes in your life? Care to share a wisdom or two? We could all use some help. I know I do! Thanks.